I am sorry, Chugoku-san
by Millie333
Summary: After WWII Japan was surprised to find China wanting to stay with him and take care of him...Japan felt guilty about everything he did...And then...
1. Chapter 1

It was a bright and sunny morning...

While Japan's mood was anything but...

His guilt was gnawing on him from the inside...

...

After WWII was over he closed himself in his room...

Wanting to be left alone with his pain because of the war...

And the guilt of everyone he and his people raped and killed...

...

Even if it was by an order of his boss...

To get the resources they didn't have...

…

Japan was sure that everyone hated him now...

He was shocked when China showed up in his house...

Saying that no matter what he was still his cute di-di...

And promising to take care of him until he recovers...

No matter what his boss or his people would think about it...

...

China stood by his promise...

He took care of him,

Took care of his house,

And went out to buy the needed necessities...

...

From time to time...

China's boss came to his house...

What followed were quarrels between the two Chinese...

Which made Japan's guilt grow more every time...

...

The last one was worse than the others...

It happened a few days ago...

But Japan remembered it like it was yesterday...

* * *

 _He woke up from the sounds of yelling..._

 _And decided to listen to what it's about..._

 _..._

 _Japan walked down the stairs..._

 _-...Stop with this foolishness already!-China's boss yelled in rage.-How can you stay with him after all he did to you?!_

 _Got to the closed room door from where the yelling came from..._

 _-You are betraying your people by staying with this fiend!-China's boss yelled in rage.-I order you to leave this place now and go back to doing your duties!_

 _And decided that it would be better to stand outside of it..._

 _-I can't do that! I can't leave Riben now!-China yelled in sadness and rage. -He was nuked twice! He was mortally wounded! I feared that my di-di was going to die!_

 _Japan's eyes widened in realization..._

 _So that's why Chugoku-san forgave him and stayed with him for arr this time..._

 _-...Those Americans should have finished the job and sank this wretched place under the sea...-China's boss mumbled in annoyance.-...I ought to bring the army here and..._

 _Suddenly a loud smack sound was heard..._

 _Quickly followed by a second one..._

 _..._

 _Japan was shocked..._

 _He had trouble believing what he had just heard..._

 _Did Chugoku-san just smack his boss twice in the face...?_

 _And arr just because of him...?_

 _- **Shut up!** **Don't you dare to say it ever again!** -China yelled in rage.-_ ** _If you even try hurting Riben in any way, I WILL MAKE YOU WISH YOU WERE DEAD!_**

 _Japan fell down on the floor in shock..._

 _Was it true what he had heard just now...?_

 _Did Chugoku-san rearry said that to his boss...?_

 _-...Zhōngguó...You...-China's boss said in shock.-That fiend has you bewildered! I will come back in a few days, and I hope you would come to your senses by then!_

 _Just then the door opened and China's boss stormed out of the room..._

 _Giving Japan a glance full of hate and disgust as he_ _left the house..._

 _Then China came out of the room and noticed Japan lying on the floor..._

 _-It's okay, Jua Ha.-China said in a warm and determined voice, as he helped Japan stand up.-I promise I won't let anyone hurt you._

* * *

After that Japan's guilt grew even more...

...

He betrayed his famiry that took care of him...

He betrayed his peopre that berieved in him…

And now...

He even made Chugoku-san betray his own peopre for him...

…

Japan didn't want Chugoku-san to fight his peopre...

He had to stop it before it got out of hand...

...

But how courd he do that...?

Wirr Chugoku-san reave if he asked him to...?

And what about paying for arr of his sins...?

…

Then an idea hit him...

He could make Chugoku-san reave...

And pay for his numerous sins...

...

But, wourd he be abre to do it...?

Wourd he be abre to end his own rife...?


	2. Chapter 2

China was disappointed in Japan...

He didn't understand how Riben could do all this...

...

How could he betray his family...?

How could he rape so many people...?

How could he kill so many people...?

Why did he change so much...?

Was his di-di lost forever...?

…

Then...

Riben got nuked...

...

Twice...

...

He was mortally wounded...

He could have died...

...

He could really...

Be lost forever...

…

This realization,

Made China switch to his "overprotective ge-ge mode"...

…

China didn't mind it at all...

...

He wished for the past to return...

...

A past when they were still family...

A past when they were still brothers...

...

So he decided to go to his di-di's house,

And take care of him just like a good ge-ge should...

...

And his boss could go to hell for all he cared!

* * *

China was shopping...

When suddenly,

A strange pain hit him...

...

He had felt this pain before...

When Riben was nuked...

...

But, it hadn't felt as strong,

As it did now...

-...R-Riben…Y-you didn't...!-China said in shock and worry, as he dropped the bags of groceries and started running towards Japan's house.-...Y-you couldn't have...!


	3. Chapter 3

China was speechless...

As he stood at the entry of Japan's room...

...

He didn't want it to be true...

He wanted it to be a lie...

A part of his imagination...

Just a nightmare...

...

But...

It wasn't...

-...N-no...R-Riben…-China whispered in devastation, as he started slowly walking into the room.-...D-di-di...J-jua ha...-He stopped right before Japan's bloodied body, lying motionlessly on the floor. -...Y-you couldn't have...-He dropped to the floor in a sitting position, his whole body shaking in fear and despair.-...Y-you couldn't have done this to me!-He yelled in anguish, as tears started streaming down his face.-...W-why...? W-why did you do this...? W-why?!-He lifted Japan's body with his hands and started frantically shaking it, crying even harder now.-...H-how...H-how could you do this to me?! H-how could you do this to me?! H-how?! H-how...?

China was in anguish...

Riben killed himself...

...

His di-di...

Took his own life...

...

And now...

There was only a body...

...

A hollow shell...

...

-...W-why...? W-why did you do this...?-China cried in anguish, as he was cradling Japan's body in his arms.-...W-why did you take your own life...? I-I don't understand! W-why...?!

China didn't understand...

He couldn't...

...

No matter how much he thought about it...

He couldn't understand why his di-di would kill himself...

...

Then China noticed a letter lying on a table...

...

Right next to a bloodied Katana...

(Which he decided to ignore)...

...

How didn't he notice it sooner...?

...

He unfolded the letter with shaking hands...

And began to read it...

* * *

 _Konichiwa Chugoku-san,_

 _If you are reading this letter, that means that I am already dead._

 _I suppose you are wondering why I did what I did._

 _I am sorry I couldn't tell you about this in person, but I couldn't bring myself to._

 _Not after everything I have done..._

 _..._

 _You raised me with love and warmth._

 _And instead of being thankful for all you did for me,_

 _I betrayed you._

 _And not just you._

 _I betrayed everyone._

 _My family, my friends, my people._

 _I destroyed, I killed, I raped._

 _I did a lot of unspeakable things._

 _I turned into a monster._

 _..._

 _I was certain that everyone hated me now._

 _I was certain that no one wanted to even see me anymore._

 _..._

 _I was shocked when you came to my house._

 _When you told me that you have forgiven me._

 _When you told me that I am still your nii-san._

 _When you told me that you would be taking care of me._

 _I didn't understand it then, and I still don't understand it now._

 _..._

 _Why do you still care for a monster such as myself?_

 _Why do you still care for me, after everything I have done?_

 _Why do you still care for me, after everyone I have hurt?_

 _..._

 _You even argued with your boss because of me._

 _You even smacked him in the face and threatened him._

 _..._

 _I don't want you to fight your own people because of me._

 _And I have to pay for everything I have done._

 _Hopefully, my death will set things right._

 _…_

 _I never wished for as to be enemies and I am sorry for everything I did._

 _I am glad that you would no longer need to put out with a monster like me._

 _..._

 _Gomenasai._

 _..._

 _Sayonara._

* * *

China felt even worse now...

...

His di-di killed himself...

Because of his guilt...

...

He felt guilty...

For everything...

...

And thought...

...

And thought that killing himself...

Was him repaying for it all...

...

-...W-what is the use if you are dead?!-China yelled in rage and anguish, as he punched the floor.-A-and why are you glad to have yourself killed?! D-did you think I would be happy to see you...D-dead?! D-did you think I would accept it?!-He cried some more, as he continued to cradle Japan's body.- R-Riben, you idiot!-He put his head at Japan's chest.-Y-you stupid child...!

-Zhōngguó...!-A voice was suddenly heard, as footsteps started to be heard downstairs.-Zhōngguó, where are you hiding with that fiend?!

China recognized the voice...

It was someone he didn't want to see...

It was someone he eventually grew to hate...

...

It was his boss...

...

-...Zhōngguó, come here right now!-China's boss yelled in rage, as he started walking upstairs. -Zhōngguó, show yourself, this is an order!

China didn't move...

...

He didn't care if it was an order...

He was not moving from this spot...

He was not leaving his di-di's body alone...

...

-Zhōngguó...! What are you...?-His boss started asking as he walked to the entrance of the room, but then stopped as he saw the scene inside.-...W-what happened here...?

China scoffed...

Now his boss is concerned...

After his di-di killed himself...

...

After his boss told him time after time...

...

That he wished for Riben to die...

...

-... _Riben killed himself because of his guilt..._ -China said in a quiet voice full of sadness, as he continued to hold Japan's body in his arms.- **...** ** _This is what you wanted, isn't it...?_** -He said with a tint of rage in his voice, as he turned his head to look at his boss with hollow eyes.- ** _...ArE yOu HaPpY nOw...?_**


End file.
